Who Says The Forces Have No Sense Of Humour?

Punch soldiers 1

Here are some recent extracts from serving officers’ reports:
1. His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity
2. This man is depriving a village somewhere of its idiot
3. He couldn’t organise a 50% leave in a 2-man submarine
4. He would be out of his depth in a puddle
5. He is technically sound but socially impossible
6. When he joined he was something of an old woman, since when he has aged considerably
7. He has reached rock bottom and has now started to dig
8. He sets low personal standards and consistently fails to achieve them
9. He has the wisdom of youth and the energy of old age
10. He should go far, and the sooner he starts the better
11. In my opinion this officer should not be authorised to fly below 250 feet
12. The only ship I would recommend for this man is citizenship
13. He couldn’t organise a woodpeckers’ picnic in a forest
14. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat.
15. I would not breed from this officer


About Russell James

Author of some 2 dozen books in a 30-year career. Crime and historical fiction. Non-fiction too (including 4 biographical encyclopedias).
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